I feel so blessed to have him in my life. Everything seems so surreal. Like, I never thought that the person I hate the most would be my redemption; would become my everything. I took a shower and walked out and saw no one. I sighed and wore my clothes.
I sat on bed and looked at my wedding ring. I smiled sadly looking at it. A lot has happened ever since our marriage, Christian broke me and then fixed me and when we are about to start our lives anew, I was truly defiled and then again he devoted his life to make me feel pure and he was successful in it, he gave me a life no one could. He made me feel loved, protected, safe and pure. I feel so secure in his arms, I feel so loved. Ah, how I used to hate his touch, his presence and now the same presence give me serenity. These feelings are filling my heart. I feel so complete, I have everything in my life, I don't want anything but him. He is my salvation, he evokes such affectionate emotions in me that I feel so connected to him.
Now, he gave me every happiness, I also want to liberate him from his fears. I want to make him the happiest man alive like he made me the happiest woman alive. He had suffered enough, I want to be his redemption, I want to give him the love he died to receive. I don’t want him to be sad anymore.
I was swinging my legs and humming to myself. Then Christian entered our hotel room looking all too serious, I looked at him, his gaze met mine, his eyes flickered with intense grief, my smile faded, he kept giving me a begging look to not ask anything but I have no intentions of leaving him in this condition, it seemed like he could cry anytime. I stood up and rushed to him.
"Christian... what happened?" I asked softly, putting my hand over his shoulder. He closed his eyes and removed my hands and went to the bathroom without saying a thing.
"Christian..." I called him from outside.
"Are you alright?" I asked again but no reply came. I asked again,
"Christian, answer me. Are you okay?"
"Yea.. I am fine!" His reply came, his voice was hoarse. I opened my mouth to ask something but I heard the sound of shower. I sighed and again sat on the sofa waiting patiently for him to come out.
When he came out, he smiled at me as if nothing happened,
"You okay?" I asked. He laughed off and sat beside me.
"Yeah. Why?" He asked, being so ignorant of the reason. I moved to him and held his arms,
"Christian... don't you think you shouldn't hide your feelings from me?" I asked looking at him. His smile faded as he looked at me. He avert his gaze from mine and spoke,
"Look Sophie, we are on our honeymoon and you are so happy, I don't want to ruin your happiness. Forget about it."
"My happiness lies with you. Tell me, what happened?" I asked, giving his arm a gentle squeeze. He gulped and looked at me.
"It's nothing. Don't worry. I am fine." He gave me a smile which was not convincing at all. He stood up and gave me his usual bright smile,
"Come, let go out." I frowned and stood up.
"We are not going anywhere not until you tell me what's wrong." I sternly said. He looked at me for a while and sighed. He held my shoulders and made me sit on the sofa. He bent to his knees and grit his teeth looking down as his whole being was filled with sorrow which was unbearable for him. But not just sadness but some kind of fear too. I cupped his cheek and made him to look at me,
"Christian.. I am here for you and always will. Please don't hide your feelings from me. You saved me and I want to save you now. So, please, don't try to push yourself away from me. I am here." I said in a faint but firm tone to give him reassurance. He held my hands and looked down again.
"You promised me that you'll stay with me forever, don't you?" He asked again in that broken tone that made my heart to be torn into pieces.
"Yes. I will never leave you." His lips began to tremble as he couldn't speak another word. I pulled him in my embrace as he put his head on my laps,
"Christian.. please don't be like that..." I pleaded with him in a whisper. If I see him like this any longer, I'll break. I couldn't even see him like that, I am amazed how he consoles me in my suffering without managing to show how much he is hurting to see me like that.
"I am scared.." He whispered, his grip on my dress tightened, ".. please don't leave me.." He completed his sentence as a tear rolled down his cheek. My heart skipped a beat in dread, why did he think of something like this? I can never leave the love of my life. I stroke his head sweetly and whispered back,
"I will never leave you."
He moved is head to me and said desperately,
"Promise me Sophie, no matter what happens, no matter what I'll tell you, you'll stay by my side. Sophie, I love you so much, I'll die without you.." Tears streamed down from his face, I also get down and bend on my knees and hugged him tightly, he began to cry as I rubbed his back,
"I promise, I will stay with you to the bitter end." I promised. I was swallowing hard continuously to prevent myself from crying because if I break, he will too and I don’t want it.
Christian slightly pulled away, I wiped his tears and kissed his forehead. He looked down and spoke with his trembling lips,
"I have lost everything.. I can't lose you too.." I smiled and point at his heart,
"No matter how far we are, I will always be with you; right here. My heart is with you. Just like...." I held his hand and put it over my chest,
"Your heart is with me." I smiled widely, He looked at me for a second and sniffed. He smiled faintly and stood up. “Now, don’t think about it anymore.” I said. He smiled and nodded. He opened his mouth again but closed it, I whined and stood up,
"Christian! I told you not to hide your feelings!" I scolded him. He laughed a little and put his hands in the air.
"Yeah. I got it. I wasn't going to say anything in the first place." I sighed as he held my hands. I smiled and looked down.
"Thank you.. for coming into my life." I said lowering my gaze. He held my chin and said,
"Thank you.. for being mine." I blushed as we went.
****
We were about to leave back to New York but then I saw news on the television.
"The famous fashion designer; Merlin Florence has been arrested for selling her models to her clients illegally."
My eyes widened as I turned my head to Christian who seemed unaffected by this.
"You did this, don't you?" My voice came out vague but he heard it. I instantly regret asking him something absurd. How can I think like this? He can never do this but i have heard his conversation with Henley about hurting Merlin.
He seemed shocked for a moment but soon regained his posture and sighed. "She deserved it." A gasp escaped my lips as I felt disheartened. I didn’t expect him to do this.
"How could you do it?" I whispered sadly. He gave me a bored look and spoke nonchalantly,
"Leave out of this Sophie. She is the one who started everything."
"That doesn't give you the reason to degrade her." He spared a glance at me as a smirk appeared on his lips. I was taken aback, don’t be the ruthless Christian. He scares me. he stood up, "Come on, We're leaving."
"No. I want to know! Why did you do this!? This news has destroyed her career."
"She should be grateful that I just exterminated her career... for now." I just can't believe him. How could he do it? I walked towards him and gave him a pleading look,
"Christian.. please don't be blinded in vengeance.. You can't destroy her life just because she cheated." I tried to make him understand. This act of his caused the destruction of her career she spent years to build. I feel bad for her, Christian don't have any rights to do this.
"If it was about me, I wouldn't even dare to lay a finger on her." He hissed. My eyes widened in disbelief as I asked hesitantly,
"Then.. what .. she did?" He looked at him with his dark gaze burning in the desire to make her suffer and give her a life worse than death, my body stiff as I shivered looking at his lethal gaze.
"She spoils the pure soul of my wife."